#454 Zimrah Daniella Ahava (Jerusalem, Beer Sheva)
& Hillel Ser (Jerusalem, Jerusalem)
1) We found that Saw You at Sinai was a very original and special site, made with a lot of wisdom and care. We especially appreciated the privacy granted, and that if someone ( a potential match) was not suitable, our private details were removed so that they could no longer be seen. Another thing that we each found important, was that there was a Shadchanit/Matchmaker available to talk to if there was a problem or a question on our minds.
2) Hillel: I thought that Goldie Frohlinger was a very friendly and energetic shadchanit. She did not lose hope that I would, B'ezrat H', find a wife, even after many, many tries (at least 40!) that didn't work out for me. She had a lot of patience, and once again I want to thank her for her optimism and hope.
Zimrah: Although Goldie was not my shadchanit, she sent me a profile, who unfortunately was not even close to what I was looking for. I remember thanking her, and asking if she thought of someone else more suitable, to please let me know. She tried again - this time closer, but again not the right one for me. The third time, she sent me Hillel's profile. I had only been on the site for a month before we met. During the time Hillel & I were dating, we had a couple of issues that arose, and Goldie was available by email and telephone to help us work through them. I would also like to thank her for her patience and encouragement that made a big difference to whether or not we would continue dating towards marriage.
3) Hillel: The first time we met, I thought Zimrah had good qualities, was interesting, pretty, honest and gentle, but I thought that there was a bit of language problem because we didn't speak the same mother-tongue. Despite the language difficulties, I wanted to continue to meet, if she agreed, because I was curious and wanted to know more about her. I also felt that Zimrah appreciated and valued my efforts to come to where she lived to meet.
Zimrah: The first time we met, there weren't any instant fireworks, but I though Hillel was very kind, considerate and patient, and most importantly, he loved HaShem and Torah which were very important qualities to me. I also thought he had a lovely smile! He had also taken the time and effort to travel an hour and a half to the city where I lived, and I thought he was a real gentleman to make sure I got home safely after we'd met. When he asked to continue meeting, I agreed.
4) In some of our first dates, we met with the help of an English-Hebrew dictionary!!! Now we can look back and laugh over some of our early miscommunications. As we got to know one another better, this improved.
Zimrah: -Each time we met, there was something new or different: a different place, or as our friendship grew, getting together with different friends and relatives. Hillel liked to be spontaneous, and took me to different restaurants and cafes, or we went for walks in different locations.
Hillel: - Zimrah got a job as a nanny close to where I lived so we could meet together more conveniently. Sometimes we took the youngest with us for a walk in his pram. People asked us in surprise if we already had children!
5) Any Advice?
Firstly, pray to G-d for help to find the right person to marry. We acknowledge that it's a miracle and gift of G-d that we met and married.
Don't immediately disqualify a potential match. Sometimes it takes a bit of compromise, and you might be pleasantly surprised how things work out.
It helps if you really want to get married, and are ready to make a commitment.
Decide what's really important, and overlook what's not, e.g. secondary things that are nice, but not necessary. If you have a lot in common, and the other person has "midot tovot" (good qualities), sometimes it's better to weigh these against the one or 2 things you don't like rather than writing the other person off.
Lastly, if you have any questions or problems, don't be embarrassed or too shy to contact your shadchanit/matchmaker for help or advice. Like Goldie was there for us, they're there to help you, and are available and happy to listen and give suggestions or advice.
We wish each of you B'chatzlechah (success) and B'sorot tovot (good news).
Hillel & Zimrah