ROSH HASHANA IS A NEW BEGINNING:
PROPER (MARRIAGE) PREPARATION PREVENTS POOR PERFORMANCE
By Sherrie B. Miller
Let’s examine the two words for Rosh Hashana: Rosh means beginning and shana means
year. We are celebrating the beginning of a new year. What is the significance of
these two words and the message they impart?
Shana refers to the dimension of time and stems from the same root as “shinui,”
change. We must change with time or we will stagnate and die. We choose to move
forward or backward; nothing can exist in a vacuum. But we must be adamant in our
resolve to better ourselves and make the necessary adjustments in ourselves before
we can hope to attain a fulfilling and satisfying relationship with someone else.
The beginning of a new year is a time of reflection, a time to stop and to introspect
and assess what I’ve accomplished in the past year to determine and choose my destination
for the coming year.
Rosh Hashana is a time to ask myself how well I have succeeded in achieving my goals
of last year, what needs to be improved and changed, traits that I need to eliminate
and traits that I need to incorporate to reach higher goals in the coming year.
Our Rabbis tell us that it is easier to learn the entirety of Mishna (the oral law)
than to change one character trait. However, they console us with the adage: “according
to the effort, is the reward!” (l’fum tzara agra!)
Marriage is the pivotal arena for interfacing the lower self with the divine self,
by requiring me to see my reflection, the good and the bad, through my partner.
We are faced with many unpleasant revelations about ourselves and must choose if
we wish to play the “blame game” and project the flaw on to my partner, rendering
me unchanged and smug, or accepting responsibility and seeking the path of self-refinement
and moving toward my true essence of G-dliness.
One cannot do this work alone. In the book of Genesis we are told “it is not good
for Man to be alone.” It is precisely for this reason that G-d split the all encompassing
Man into a Man and a Woman, in order for there to be an encounter, a meaningful
dialogue through which each gender collectively and individually is afforded the
unique opportunity of knowing and understanding themselves first and then their
other half. This holy encounter leads to a total integration and perfection of male
and female traits and heals the original fragmentation of the universe while re-uniting
us with our Maker.
The letters of Rosh, when scrambled, spell “osher,” happiness. Happiness is a product
of a job well done. Happiness is a sense of satisfaction that the yeoman’s effort
that I made bore fruit and I have been able to live a much more meaningful life.
The first Parsha of the year, Breishit, also includes the word Rosh as well as the
word “bayit,” home.
The implicit message in this title of the Creation indicates that the preliminary
and primary purpose of the Creation is achieved through the home. G-d’s expectation
of us is to make him a home on earth in which His Glory will be revealed and appreciated.
Create your ideal relationship this year!
Prepare to build and strengthen your marriage and discover the ultimate fulfillment
and satisfaction in your life.
Prepare-Enrich Israel is offering a series of 6 workshops beginning October 22 in
See you there!
Blessings for a joyous and meaningful new year!
Sherrie B. Miller is a Jewish Matchmaker
on SawYouAtSinai.com and works with
Jewish Singles all over the world. She is an educational guidance counselor,
group leader, pre-marital coach, matchmaker and Judaic Studies teacher. Sherrie
is dedicated to promoting and enhancing emotional intelligence and communication
skills in conjunction with Torah values.
Sherrie received her educational counseling degree from the Michlalah in Bayit Vegan
and an M.A. in Education and Counseling from Touro College, Jerusalem, Israel. Sherrie
also holds a B.A. in Speech Pathology and Audiology from Brooklyn College and a
B.Sc. from Yeshiva University in Jewish Education. Sherrie is certified by Midreshet
Emunah and is accredited by the Rabbanut of Israel, to be a pre-marital couple’s
counselor and Kallah teacher.
Before coming to Israel in 1989 from Great Neck, New York, Sherrie taught Judaic
Studies at the North Shore Hebrew Academy. Sherrie also educated affiliated and
unaffiliated adults through the “Project Identity” outreach program under the directorship
of Rabbi Yaakov Lerner. Sherrie trained individuals and couples in the laws of Kashrut,
Guidelines of Parenting, Parshat Shavua and Pirkei Avot.
In her work as a Guidance Counselor in the national religious “Mamad” school, "Yehuda
Halevi", Sherrie instructed life skill workshops to students, parents and teachers,
with a focus on communication, conflict resolution and anger management. She also
leads support groups for children of divorce.
Sherrie is certified by the Life Center and leads Parenting workshops based on the
Faber/Mazlish workshops on, “How To Talk So Kids Will Listen and Listen So Kids
Sherrie is an executive board member of the Emunah World Zionist Organization, Mibreishit,
led by Rav Motti Alon, and Nishmat led my Rabbanit Hanna Henkin.
Sherrie’s diverse background in counseling and teaching, combined with torah principles
and values contribute to the depth and quality of her success with clients. Lessons
drawn from her own life transitions make her coaching perspective uniquely inspirational.
Sherrie helps individuals clarify their goals and take masterful action steps to
reach them. Sherrie is professionally known for her guidance in the educational
system as well as her outstanding capabilities teaching interpersonal relationship
skills to groups and individuals.
Having made a number of successful matches resulting in marriage, Sherrie volunteers
as a matchmaker for SawYouAtSinai, an internet matchmaking site.