Lag B’Omer falls on the 18th of Iyar and is the 33rd day in the counting that begins on the second day of Pesach until Shavuot.
The “omer” offering is brought on the first day of these seven weeks to the Holy Temple, consisting of flour from the newly ripened barley harvest.
The “new offering” brought on Shavuot consists of the first offering brought from the new wheat crop in the form of two when loaves of bread.
Barley is known to be a food ingested by animals while bread signifies and commemorates Holy meals accompanied by special blessing and requiring the Birkat HaMazon.
The 50 day sefirah, connecting between Pesach and Shavuot is seen a progressive transformation from lowly animalistic tendencies and passivity as we received G-d’s gift of freedom from slavery, to spiritual maturity and the attainment of an active and covenantal partnership and commitment to Torah.
The celebration of Lag B’Omer commemorates the end of the plague that killed 24,000 of Rabbi Akiva’s students, 12,000 chevrutot (study partners). According to Chazal the plague was caused due to the disrespect shown by the students toward one another.
18th of Iyar is Chai, life! Lamed –Gimel spelled backward is gal, wave.
One could say that life is full of waves, differences of opinion, disagreements and conflicts, but although we cannot stop the waves we can learn to surf!
Not everyone is born with innate emotional intelligence, yet the good news is that these skills can be learned! Choice of the Heart is an organization that I began with Lori Lurie to promote marriage education for nearly and newlyweds to provide marriage minded people with the necessary skills required in a thriving relationship.
Life presents many challenges and many opportunities for growth. The goal of Torah is to unify the Jewish people with an authentic solidarity thus creating a formidable force that will impact the world positively and bring about the revelation of Hashem’s Presence. This must be done despite and because of our unique and individual approaches to life.
In this week’s Parshat Emor the Torah instructs the Kohen to wave the offering;
“l’hanif” comes from the root “nof”, which means view. Perhaps the lesson is that we learn to see and understand each other’s point of view. When we can respect and hold another’s vantage point within, we give them the comfort, security and empowerment to return the gesture.
After all, no two people are exactly alike. If we were identical to another, one of us would be superfluous. Just as we don’t expect anyone’s face to look like ours, so too we ought not expect another’s opinions, thought or feelings to be identical to ours.
Differences of opinion bring about increased creativity, productivity and more prolific accomplishments!
Rather then fanning the flames of discord and dissonance, let us learn to truly respect each other’s diversity of opinions though different.
In relationships, respect is the most fundamental attribute in preserving and cultivating harmony.
Unconditional love is difficult to sustain in the midst of a heated argument. Genuine respect however, will carry us through. The admiration we feel toward our partner will automatically create the necessary boundaries in dealing with the conflict at hand in a mature and rational fashion.
To get to Shavuot, to a state of readiness to receive the Torah, we must be united k’ish echad, b’lev echad, as one person with one heart.
We need to put our ego aside and step into an other’s shoes and truly see where they are coming from and where they need to go. We need to make room for each other within ourselves and help each other feel safe in a world that is so divisive and intimidating.
Then the “new offering” brought on Shavuot will be waved enthusiastically as we reach the peak of our potential!
Chag Sameach!
About author:
Sherrie B. Miller is a Jewish Matchmaker on SawyouAtSinai.com and works with Jewish Singles all over the world. She is an educational guidance counselor, group leader, pre-marital coach, matchmaker and Judaic Studies teacher. Sherrie is dedicated to promoting and enhancing emotional intelligence and communication skills in conjunction with Torah values.
Sherrie received her educational counseling degree from the Michlalah in Bayit Vegan and an M.A. in Education and Counseling from Touro College, Jerusalem, Israel. Sherrie also holds a B.A. in Speech Pathology and Audiology from Brooklyn College and a B.Sc. from Yeshiva University in Jewish Education. Sherrie is certified by Midreshet Emunah and is accredited by the Rabbanut of Israel, to be a pre-marital couple’s counselor and Kallah teacher.
Before coming to Israel in 1989 from Great Neck, New York, Sherrie taught Judaic Studies at the North Shore Hebrew Academy. Sherrie also educated affiliated and unaffiliated adults through the “Project Identity” outreach program under the directorship of Rabbi Yaakov Lerner. Sherrie trained individuals and couples in the laws of Kashrut, Guidelines of Parenting, Parshat Shavua and Pirkei Avot.
In her work as a Guidance Counselor in the national religious “Mamad” school, "Yehuda Halevi", Sherrie instructed life skill workshops to students, parents and teachers, with a focus on communication, conflict resolution and anger management. She also leads support groups for children of divorce.
Sherrie is certified by the Life Center and leads Parenting workshops based on the Faber/Mazlish workshops on, “How To Talk So Kids Will Listen and Listen So Kids Will Talk”
Sherrie is an executive board member of the Emunah World Zionist Organization, Mibreishit, led by Rav Motti Alon, and Nishmat led my Rabbanit Hanna Henkin.
Sherrie’s diverse background in counseling and teaching, combined with torah principles and values contribute to the depth and quality of her success with clients. Lessons drawn from her own life transitions make her coaching perspective uniquely inspirational. Sherrie helps individuals clarify their goals and take masterful action steps to reach them. Sherrie is professionally known for her guidance in the educational system as well as her outstanding capabilities teaching interpersonal relationship skills to groups and individuals.
Having made a number of successful matches resulting in marriage, Sherrie volunteers as a matchmaker for SawYouAtSinai, an internet matchmaking site.
Other Articles
Blind Spots
ROSH HASHANA IS A NEW BEGINNING:
PROPER (MARRIAGE) PREPARATION PREVENTS POOR PERFORMANCE
PARSHAT BAMIDBAR: A DESERT EXPERIENCE PRIOR TO MATAN TORAH
PARSHAT BEHAR-BECHUKOTAI: CLIMBING THE MOUNTAIN
LAG B’OMER: FANNING THE FLAMES
PARSHAT METZORA: THE GOSSIP CRAZE
BIRKAT HACHAMA: THE SUN AND THE MOON IN TANDEM
PARSHAT MISHPATIM: KEEP THE FLAME BURNING!
PARSHAT BO: TIME IS OF THE ESSENCE!
PARSHAT SHMOT: COMMUNICATION AT ITS BEST!
PARSHAT VAYIGASH: CREATING RAPPORT
PARSHAT VAYESHEV: TRANQUILITY
VS. GROWTH
PARSHAT VAYISHLACH: THE POWER OF PRAYER
PARSHAT VA’YETZE: THREE THINGS
SUSTAIN THE WORLD: TORAH, AVODA AND GEMILUT CHASADIM
PARSHAT TOLDOT: LOVE DEPENDS
ON NO-THING!
THE HIGH HOIDAYS: REACHING FOR THE STARS
PARSHAT NIZAVIM: THE SECRET OF LOVE IS COMMITMENT
PARSHAT KI TETZE: THE WARRIOR WITHIN
TU B’AV: THE JEWISH VALENTINE’S DAY! “GETTING THE LOVE YOU WANT”
PARSHAT MASAY: THE JOURNEY FROM DATING TO MARRIAGE AND BEYOND
PARSHAT PINCHAS: HOW DO I MAKE OTHERS FEEL?
SHAVUOT: I PLEDGE TO BE A “HUMAN BECOMING”
TRUE INDEPENDENCE: CHOOSING TOGETHERNESS!
PARSHAT KEDOSHIM: LOVE YOUR NEIGHBOR AS YOURSELF!
THE STRANGE FIRE: ROMANTIC LOVE VS. TRUE LOVE PARSHAT SHMINI
Parshat Tzav - Mitzvot As Spiritual Practices: Enthusiastic Actions That Bring Us Together!
PARSHAT VAYIKRA: SELF ESTEEM AS DESTINY
PARASHOT VAYAKHEL-PIKUDEI: THE “DATING GAME”: PAVING THE ROAD TO MARRIAGE
PARSHAT KI TISA: INVEST IN YOUR RELATIONSHIP!
PARSHAT TEZAVEH: A LOVE THAT LASTS FOREVER
MAKE YOUR PROFILE COUNT
THE STORY OF CHANUKA: REVEALING THE LIGHT WITHIN!
Parshat Yayishlach: Communication- The Key to Intimacy.
GIVING OR GETTING?
PARSHAT NOACH: HARMONY IN DIVERSITY
PARSHAT KI TAVO: SELF-NULLIFICATION
PARSHAT RE’EH: CHOICES!
TU B’AV: THE JEWISH VALENTINE’S DAY!
TISHA B’AV: MOURNING THE DESTRUCTION OF OUR TEMPLE
PARSHAT BALAK: UNITE OR UNTIE: IT ALL DEPENDS ON THE “I” (EYE)!
PARSHAT CHUKAT: CONTROL ANGER BEFORE IT CONTROLS YOU!
PARSHAT KORACH: “IF YOU SPOT IT, YOU GOT IT!”
PARSHAT SHLACH: THE ATTITUDE OF GRATITUDE
PARSHAT B’HAALOTCHA: LEARN TO LAUGH AT YOURSELF
SHAVUOT: ” NA’ASSE V’NISHMA” COMMITMENT COMES FIRST!
Parshat Behar: Dating Etiquette
PARSHAT EMOR: A LEAP OF FAITH
THE POWER OF SPEECH: PARSHAT TAZRIA-METZORA
PASSOVER: “A STORY OF LOVE”
PURIM: FINDING TRUE HAPPINESS!
JEWISH DATING: THE ART OF LISTENING
FOR JEWISH SINGLES
JEWISH DATING: INNER BEAUTY IS THE REAL BEAUTY
Finding Your Beshert
The Rise, Fall and Subsequent Rise of the Jewish Matchmaker, otherwise known as The Shadchan
“OnlySimchas” for Jewish Singles Dating
Jewish Singles: Challenges for Jewish Singles Dating today
Jewish Dating 101: You reached the age for “Jewish Dating” for marriage, now what
Love and Beauty
Make your profile count
In The Ballpark
Are You in Love with Love?
How to Find Your Soul Mate: Secrets from the Kabbalah
The Silent Revolution of the Modern Era
To "Settle" or Hold Out for Happily Ever After
‘My Matchmaker Ignored Me!’ And Other Ways I Can Empathize
Cliffs Notes for the Jewish Dater
The Ten Commandments of Dating
